Wrestling with God

One of the most interesting stories in the Old Testament is found in Genesis 32. There we hear the story of Jacob wrestling with God. Or is it the story of Jacob wrestling with an angel? Jacob had to face his brother Esau the next day. His anxiety comes through even in that ancient account. The text says that Jacob wrestled “with a Man.” But this is not the end of the matter. They wrestle throughout the night. Jacob has a grip on the Man and refuses to release him.

“I will not let you go until you bless me!” he says.

The Man injures Jacob, “knocking his hip out of joint” (possibly withering it). But Jacob does not release him. The Man asks, “What is your name?” Jacob answers. And then he is told, “Your name will be ‘Israel,’ for you have wrestled with God and with man and prevailed.”

Jacob asks for the Man’s name. “Why do you ask my name?” comes the reply.

And the story concludes by telling us that Jacob named the place, “Peniel,” (“Face of God”), “because,” he said, “I have seen God face-to-face and my life is preserved.”

It is an amazing story. It is not the first time in Genesis that a story shifts between the identity of a man (or angel) and God himself. The same dynamic occurs in Genesis 18 (the hospitality of Abraham). The story, as told, allows for the plausible denial that Jacob wrestled with God. But Jacob himself is under no illusion. “I have seen God face-to-face,” he says and the story only makes sense if we allow that meaning.

And that brings us to the first problem: how can a man wrestle with God?How can the text suggest that Jacob sees God face-to-face, much less holds him in an unbreakable grip throughout the night? I don’t know, but it does.

And this is the striking character of the Biblical witness. What some would dismiss as primitive nonsense, the Bible presents as an unvarnished account. The God of the Christians can not only enter into a wrestling match, He can lose!

Passages such as this should not be taken as some extreme anthropomorphism. They should be taken at face value and allowed to speak the mystery with which they were written. This story was told, and no editor’s hand throughout the centuries has ever sought to fix it or make it more palatable.

Of course, the God of Jacob is also the Incarnate God/Man Jesus Christ. He is not only susceptible to wrestling, He is capable of being nailed to a Cross and suspended above the earth.

And this is so much the point. As one who has spent plenty of time in the middle of the night pondering my life, God, and everything else – I can say that those things worth considering are never just vague generalities. I have never wondered how I might love mankind, but I have agonized more than once over how I might love a single person. We never wrestle in general – real wrestling is quite personal, particular and face-to-face.

The spiritual life, rightly lived, is a constant movement towards the particular. It becomes more specific with every moment. Modern religious thought is rife with vague words. It tempts us with generalized associations and abstract loyalties. At its worst, it marries itself to utility and seeks to “do good” and “help” people – and measures its goodness and help with the yardstick of some vague and noble goal. Utility is the measuring stick of the infernal regions. The generalities of Utilitarianism breed pride. The arrogance of modern man is found in the absurdity of his broad designs: “The War on Poverty.” “Take Democracy to the World.” “Equality, Fraternity, Liberty.” But it is the intricacy and intractability of very specific human persons and their struggles that humble us.

This pattern of action is seen in God Himself. For God, not even a single sparrow falls but He knows it. The hairs of our head are numbered, and He calls us each by name. God cannot be avoided by hiding in the crowd, for He seeks us out and challenges us to wrestle. He waits for us to seize Him and hold Him and demand His blessing. He longs for us to grip Him in such a manner that He can wither a thigh and change our name.

It is specifics that leave us sleepless. Generic Christianity has very few wrestling matches beyond the demands of civility. I recall that my own struggle in becoming Orthodox was deeply driven by its specific demands. “Is this really necessary? Is it not enough to just agree with it and maybe hang a few icons?” But Church is never, properly, a vague generality, a loose associational preference. It is a terrible demand, crushing in its refusal to compromise. Our modern tendency towards generalities, including within the topic of Church, is born of a false set of practices that rob the soul of every edge and boundary. Carried far enough, even God cannot get a good grip on us. Our souls become slippery, able to slip out of every contradiction and inconvenience.

But it is the true God who lies awake at night and troubles the sleep of the anxious and sets the conscience on fire. God is ready to wrestle with us, and even delights Himself in losing.

For the LORD has chosen Jacob for Himself, Israel for His special treasure. (Ps 135:4)

About Fr. Stephen Freeman

Fr. Stephen is a retired Archpriest of the Orthodox Church in America. He is also author of Everywhere Present: Christianity in a One-Storey Universe, and Face to Face: Knowing God Beyond Our Shame, as well as the Glory to God podcast series on Ancient Faith Radio.



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19 responses to “Wrestling with God”

  1. Maria Avatar
    Maria

    Hello Father,

    Did God lose? Could it not be seen as a tie broken by a withered thigh?

  2. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Maria,
    The notion of God “losing” is clearly a paradox. But the name “Israel” that was given to Jacob, indicates that he “prevailed.” Remember, this is the same God who says to us, “He who loses his life for my sake we save it.”

  3. Helen Avatar
    Helen

    Thank you for this post, Father.
    The more I think about it, the more it seems that in our time (maybe not just in our time), it might be necessary to enter this arena and wrestle with God. We may be wounded, we may have a new name (how we see ourselves), but we never lose.

  4. Christa Avatar
    Christa

    ” I have never wondered how I might love mankind, but I have agonized more than once over how I might love a single person. We never wrestle in general – real wrestling is quite personal, particular and face-to-face.”

    “But it is the true God who lies awake at night and troubles the sleep of the anxious and sets the conscience on fire.”

    Wrestling with God…It reframes my struggle and tears. Thank you.

  5. Justin Avatar
    Justin

    But it is the true God who lies awake at night and troubles the sleep of the anxious and sets the conscience on fire.

    Ummm, thanks(?).
    I was always under the impression it was my own fault.
    This is a hard saying.

  6. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Justin,
    We are not alone in these struggles of ours.

  7. Margaret Sarah Avatar
    Margaret Sarah

    Thank you for these reflections, Father! One question about the following:

    “Passages such as this should not be taken as some extreme anthropomorphism. They should be taken at face value and allowed to speak the mystery with which they were written. This story was told, and no editor’s hand throughout the centuries has ever sought to fix it or make it more palatable.”

    I’m curious about how we can take some passages (such as this one) and read into its depth, while at the same time regarding other more difficult Old Testament passages (regarding violence) with perhaps less “face-value”. I’m particularly wrestling with the “agential” passages, where God seems to command, cause, etc.

    Any thoughts?

  8. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Margaret,
    St. Gregory of Nyssa once wrote and suggested that certain passages in the Scriptures offer an “immoral” picture of God. He suggests that in such instances we should look to an allegorical reading rather than a literal. Cf. The Song of Moses.

    I’m not suggesting that this be the pattern for reading all the time (but it’s closer to what I myself do), but as an illustration of how one of the great giants of the Church handled certain difficulties in Scripture.

    That’s where simply “residing” in the bosom of the Church helps. It allows us to rest in the consensus of the faith even in “troubled waters.” Another way that I understand this is to always look for Christ within any reading. St. Maximus the Confessor and St. Ambrose of Milan described the Old Testament as “shadow,” the New Testament as “icon,” and the age to come as the “thing itself.”

  9. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Margaret,
    Here’s a quote from St. Gregory:

    [O]ne ought not in every instance to remain with the letter (since the obvious sense of the words often does us harm when it comes to the virtuous life), but one ought to shift to an understanding that concerns the immaterial and intelligible, so that corporeal ideas may be transposed into intellect and thought when the fleshly sense of the words has been shaken off like dust.

  10. Ook Avatar
    Ook

    This passage has been particularly challenging for me from a cultural viewpoint, with the specific choice of wrestling as form of struggle. Wrestling brings up images of Hulk Hogan and other comedic figures from childhood TV programs, I had childhood friends who were wont to say things like “I’ll wrassle you fer it”, generally followed by unpleasantness, and there was that unfortunate high school wrestling team. So I have to consciously remind myself to ignore this cultural overlay when reading Genesis.

  11. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Ook,
    I grew up watching the occasional wrestling match on tv. But, my homelife was dysfunctional enough that I’ve seen the real thing…and was occasionally the object of a bully’s wrestling moves. All quite unpleasant. To wrestle all night is a serious thing.

  12. Tom F Avatar

    How do we continue the wrestling match when we are weary over a particular issue? I myself have been wrestling over a particular issue for years and I am finding it increasingly difficult to continue the struggle to be honest. Every time I want to leave the fight I hear the words, “Where will you go?” But when I return to the ring it feels like I am fighting the immovable object. It’s frustrating to say the least.

  13. Simon Avatar
    Simon

    I have always been highly skeptical at allegorizing offensive depictions of God in order to save myself from confronting the possibility that the OT was written by a tribal society that worshipped a tribal god. I am not saying to toss the OT. No one would even consider the possibility. Even if “great giants of the church” did that, that isn’t very helpful. I believe that when we hear that because the great giants did that we must, too. It anesthetizes a person from feeling the conflict. If you really want to wrestle with God, leave the text as it is and allow yourself to experience the feelings it elicits when you read it. It will tell you who you are.

    I was in a discussion one time with a friend and I referred to my life as one long wrestling event with God. I was rebuffed to the point of silence. I was told that only the Saints are the ones who wrestle with God because they are the only ones that really know him. God wrestles with those whom he calls friends. I am never going to be any saint, but I had always desired friendship with God. It was like learning that I would never be someone that God could be friends with.

    Water under the bridge I suppose.

  14. Simon Avatar
    Simon

    This complements the article on the scriptures and the church.

    My general impression is that the church has told me repeatedly that it is everything and I am nothing. I think that is a fair message. It has everything to offer and I come as a pauper, a beggar, in poverty skinned and thrown about, a sinner laden with shame from having put my sin before God. How could someone as broken as I ever be friends with or wrestle with God? Do I really have so little to offer? The Church and the Saints that we praise so highly…what separates me from them? Am I really so different? I don’t know know…as I digest this it is difficult for me to accept. I certainly would never teach my children to see themselves this way. What kind of father would I be if I did that?

  15. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Tom,
    Without knowing the particulars of your situation, I’m not sure how to respond. I once heard Fr. Thomas Hopko say that “prayer is a struggle to a man’s last breath.” I do not know your issue – but I pray God gives you grace to bear it.

  16. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Simon,
    I think that all of us wrestle with God – and God calls us friends (it’s good to remember that the primary image given to us is Christ – He specifically calls us “friends”).

    I think that St. Gregory of Nyssa, for example, when He criticizes the account of Moses in the OT, is recognizing a “tribal society that worshipped a tribal god.” His use of allegory doesn’t deny it – it simply instructs us on how we read. I don’t need to become a historian to read the Scriptures – I need Christ – I need to see Jesus. St. Gregory (as in his Life of Moses) is looking for Christ.

  17. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Simon,
    Nothing separates you from the saints. You did not break yourself. You’ve mentioned before in comments that you experienced terrible trauma as a child. The trauma echoes in us as “pauper, beggar, skinned and thrown about…laden with shame.” Those are not messages from God or from the Church – but from a child who was wounded. I believe that Christ says to us – “You will be with me in paradise.” May the Lord God remember you in His kingdom, now and ever and unto the ages of ages.

  18. Edward D Cleland Avatar
    Edward D Cleland

    Thanks Father for this message. At the age of 73, I’ve been Orthodox for only three years. And, it seems to be very hard for me (in my lazy, sinful nature, I want it to be easy). It seems that every day is a wrestling match, with God and with my new Orthodox faith. Based on some very hard things going on with loved ones; I cry out to God as to why He allows them to go on and on. Yet I love Him in my weakness; Praise Him!

  19. Fr. Stephen Avatar

    Edward,
    My parents were 79 when they were received into the Church. (I’m now 71 so I sympathize with any age struggles). I had a couple enter the Church in the 80’s. As a priest, I worked with them to adjust the fast to fit their abilities. At a certain point in our lives, our health will often impose “fasts” on us that are much harder than those of the Church. I no longer eat dairy at any time of the year, related to controlling my blood sugar, etc.

    A key, for what it’s worth, is to give thanks in all things. That, of course, is not easy – but it is powerful.

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  1. Edward, My parents were 79 when they were received into the Church. (I’m now 71 so I sympathize with any…

  2. Thanks Father for this message. At the age of 73, I’ve been Orthodox for only three years. And, it seems…

  3. Simon, Nothing separates you from the saints. You did not break yourself. You’ve mentioned before in comments that you experienced…

  4. Simon, I think that all of us wrestle with God – and God calls us friends (it’s good to remember…

  5. Tom, Without knowing the particulars of your situation, I’m not sure how to respond. I once heard Fr. Thomas Hopko…


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