Drag My Soul to Paradise

A Prayer to Our Lord Jesus Christ

My most merciful and all-merciful God, O Lord Jesus Christ! In Thy great love, Thou didst come down and become flesh in order to save all. Again, I pray Thee, save me by Grace! If Thou shouldst save me because of my deeds, it would not be a gift, but merely a duty. Truly, Thou aboundest in graciousness and art inexpressibly merciful! Thou hast said, O my Christ: “He who believes in me shall live and never see death.” If faith in Thee saves the desperate, behold: I believe! Save me, for Thou art my God and my Maker. May my faith replace my deeds, O my God, for Thou wilt find no deeds to justify me. May my faith be sufficient for all. May it answer for me; may it justify me; may it make me a partaker of Thine eternal glory; and may Satan not seize me, O Word, and boast that He has torn me from Thy hand and fold. O Christ my Savior: save me whether I want it or not! Come quickly, hurry, for I perish! Thou art my God from my mother’s womb. Grant, O Lord, that I may now love Thee as once I loved sin, and that I may labor for Thee without laziness as once I labored for Satan the deceiver. Even more, I will labor for Thee, my Lord and God Jesus Christ, all the days of my life, now and ever and unto ages of ages. Amen.

From the Morning Prayers

This is among my favorite prayers and one of the most hopeful. The greater our self-knowledge and understanding, the greater our realization of just how impossible it is to live the spiritual life. There are many who seem to champion the will, certain that with the right motivation (usually threats of punishment) we will do the right thing. After years of reflection, I have come to the conclusion that this notion of the well-behaved will is born from a personality defect and is simply neurotic.

I see this expressed in any number of ways. It comes out in social media with sentiments that people simply need to work harder, or that they should not be coddled or cajoled. Some extol the virtues of dire consequences for failure. It is directed towards children (“what they need is a real good whacking!”), towards the poor, towards the depressed (“make better use of your bootstraps!), towards the wicked (“without the threat of hell they will not do good!”), and towards ourselves (self-loathing and shame). While it is true that punishment and suffering can bring about a behavioral response, I have never seen it bring about an inner change. Punishing me will never make me a better man.

What is neurotic, however, is the insistent belief that punitive measures are both necessary and salutary.

I had a coach in high school when I was on the track team. He knew nothing about running. Our entire workout consisted of running while he yelled profanities at us. I did not become a better runner. I quit before the season ended.

Sadly, my coach is a caricature of a ministerial model for some. The laity are harangued and belittled. Canons and such become weapons of imagined discipline. Those who survive rarely become better Christians. If the model is internalized, they can become angry and depressed apostles of this dark method. Our closeness to paradise cannot be measured by outward performance. Paradise resides in the heart.

I hear the heart’s cry in the prayer quoted above. The depth of its honesty provokes the hearts of those who read it. It recognizes the truth of our will and echoes St. Paul’s observations:

For I know that nothing good dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin which dwells within me. So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand….Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? (Romans 7:18-21; 24)

There is, I think, an abiding temptation towards Pelagianism (the belief that we can will our own salvation). In Orthodoxy, the teaching of “synergy” often runs in that direction. We indeed “cooperate” with God in our salvation (“cooperate” is the Latinized equivalent of “synergy”). But our cooperation is best illustrated in the prayer above. It is the cry for help from the lips of the helpless. This is not nothing – it is synergistic. But it is not the imagined synergy that some profess. We are saved by our weakness, not by our excellence.

This prayer, I believe, is an example of true spiritual growth and moral maturity. The Elder Sophrony said, “The way up is the way down.” It is the presence of true humility.

The prayer says, “Save me whether I want it or not!” In my own Southern way, I have translated this in a different idiom: “Drag my sorry soul into Paradise.”

Be merciful and kind. You will not save anyone by being harsh and demanding. When the temptation arises to fix the world (and your closest neighbor), recognize it as sin. Repent. Call out to God to drag you to a better place – whether you want it or not.

About Fr. Stephen Freeman

Fr. Stephen is a retired Archpriest of the Orthodox Church in America. He is also author of Everywhere Present: Christianity in a One-Storey Universe, and Face to Face: Knowing God Beyond Our Shame, as well as the Glory to God podcast series on Ancient Faith Radio.



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147 responses to “Drag My Soul to Paradise”

  1. Dino Avatar
    Dino

    A whole lifetime of wrestling with God, particularly on the subject of the salvation of all, is to be found in the life of Elder Sophrony.
    His disciple, Fr Zacharias, enjoys helping us understand that this, however, is an advanced period of the spiritual life, even though one can have foretaste of it from the very start. Once a purified, illumined and deified saint enters bold face-to-face conversation with God like Abraham, Moses or Silouan –i.e.: once “their new name has been given them”, the main topic of “conversation” is this. Therefore the faithful then become, like Christ, intercessors for the whole world.
    This is brought about not so much by our existential angst over the matter, a fluctuating force, but by the Holy Spirit permanently abiding is us, an incomparably different energy.

    Traditionally, however, the understanding of the wrestling match of Jacob’s night-time with God is seen as an image of something that has to come beforehand: the night-time prayer-rule (especially of a monastic programme). Staying locked into this fight to be blessed by the Lord spills over and fuels the rest of the day (with men). The Septuagint referred to by the ‘Neptic Fathers’ reads:

    “Your name shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have wrestled with God, and because of this you shall also be strong amongst men”.

    Here’s a useful excerpt from Fr Sophrony’s book on St Silouan that deals with the topic of determinisict universalism.:

    The Staretz [St Silouan] both said and wrote that Christ-like love cannot suffer any man to perish, and in its care for the salvation of all men walks the way of Calvary.
    …‘by virtue of this love the monk’s heart sorrows over the people because not all men are working out their salvation. The Lord Himself so grieved over the people that He gave Himself to death on the cross. And the Mother of God bore in her heart a like sorrow for men. And she. Like her beloved Son, desired with her whole being the salvation of all…’
    In the really Christian sense the work of salvation can only be done through love – by attracting people. There is no place for any kind of compulsion. In seeking the salvation of all men love feels impelled to embrace not only the world of the living but also the world of the dead, the underworld and the world of the as yet unborn – that is, the whole race of Adam. And if love rejoices and is glad at the salvation of a brother, she also weeps and prays over a brother who perishes…’
    …The power of love is vast and pregnant with success but it does not override. There is a domain in human life where a limit is set even to love – where love is not supreme. This domain is freedom [“προαίρεση”].
    Man’s freedom is positive, real. It concedes no determinism in his destiny, so that neither the sacrifice of Christ Himself nor the sacrifices of all those who have trodden in His footsteps lead necessarily to victory. There may be some – whether many or few, we do not know – who will meet even this perfect love, this perfect sacrifice, with a rejection, even on the eternal level, and declare, ‘I want no part in it’. It was this recognition of this abyss of freedom which prompted the Fathers of the Church to repudiate the determinist theories of the Origenists. Belief in Apocatastasis, understood as universal salvation predestined in the divine purpose, would certainly rule out the sort of prayer that we see in the Staretz.

    What was made known to the Staretz in his vision of Christ outweighed all doubt and hesitation. He knew that it was the Almighty God that had appeared to him. He was sure that the humility of Christ, which he had come to know, and the love which filled him to the limits of his strength, were the action of God the Holy Spirit. He knew in the Holy Spirit that God is boundless love and mercy, yet knowledge of this truth did not lead him to conclude that ‘anyway, we shall all be saved’.
    The Staretz was unlettered but no one surpassed him in craving for true knowledge. The path he took was, however, quite unlike that of speculative philosophers. Knowing this, I followed with the deepest interest the way in which the most heterogeneous problems were distilled in the alembic of his mind, to emerge in his consciousness as solutions. He could not develop a question dialectically and express it in a system of rational concepts – he was afraid of ‘erring in intellectual argument’; but the propositions he pronounced bore the imprint of exceptional profundity…
    …Christianity is not a philosophy, not a doctrine, but life; and all the Staretz’ conversations and writings are witness to this life…

  2. Karen Avatar
    Karen

    Paula, thanks for that link!

    Dino, thanks for the quote!

    Both a blessing to me as well…

  3. David Avatar
    David

    Not too long ago I was having a conversation with my neighbor Joe. Joe is in his eighties. He’s someone you might think of as a good ol’ boy. Joe asked me ‘Have you ever listened to a group of guys comparing stories about how bad their dad was? It’s like they are trying to outdo one another just to have the worst in the group.’ So,I had to admit that I not only knew guys like that…I had been a guy like that. Well, Joe wanted to know what was wrong with us that we would talk about our dads that way. To make a long story shory Joe being a good Catholic told me that I should pray my father because ‘I might be the only one who would.’ I instantly felt aversion and more than a little indignation at the thought of it–but, I listened Joe. And I have prayed for my parents almost every day since then. Those prayers for my father and mother have taught me much about salvation and intercessory prayer. In a way, the fact that I am the one praying for them has more force than if someone else were. I am glad I listened to Joe.

  4. Fr. Stephen Freeman Avatar

    David, et al
    I have long had the thought that I am an extension of my father in this generation working out our salvation. We were close, after a fashion. I certainly internalized many aspects of his life – not all of it very healthy. But many of the deepest things that I have had to work through were connected to him. And, of course, my parents, who were nominal Baptists, became, in turn, Anglicans, and then Orthodox at age 79 – so I know that the connections worked in both directions.

    This reality has sometimes been the darkest part of my life – or gave me the darkest thing to work through – but also the deepest satisfaction and sense of wholeness when they were, more or less, resolved. I suspect that this is always true for people, at some level, though they are not aware of it. Who we are is shaped by who our parents are/were and our interactions with them. I think, when we managed to actually resolve something, it’s like finding the solution to a knot that allows the rope to be untangled yet further.

    In the aggregate, we are all living out the tangles of Adam. Indeed, Christ, as the Second Adam, does just that, and untangles the whole thing. But He does not do things so that we don’t have to – He does things so that we can as well.

    Or so it seems to me. Your neighbor Joe sounds like a wise man. A rare thing.

  5. Dino Avatar
    Dino

    What a blessed habit David! It is absolutely vital to pray for our departed progenitors – so much so, that it can be considered entirely unacceptable not to. I might be speaking from a tradition that would be comparing stories about how good their dads were and trying to outdo one another in remembering them, but that changes nothing at all.

  6. Karen Avatar
    Karen

    Yesterday at my husband’s church with the questions on this thread (the issue of theodicy) very much on my mind, the topic addressed in music and sermon was the spiritual discipline of rest. The final song was this, which I dedicate to Simon, trusting he will overlook the style of music if it is not his preference, and hear the message, which is for all of us, but especially on my heart for him:

    https://youtu.be/ZLFak6N04GY

    Remember, the Lord has broken down the gates of hell, and hell has been invaded by the One who is Life. Don’t be afraid of hell, because He is there, even there, ever seeking us….

  7. David Waite Avatar
    David Waite

    Thank you for the wonderful story about your father, David. I was once taught to pray daily for anyone who made me angry, anyone I hated or despised. To pray for whatever they wanted: peace, serenity, Super Bowl tickets, a new truck, whatever. I was told that, if I did this, my hate and anger would eventually dissipate. It has worked well for me, bringing much peace and serenity into my life. Thanks be to God.

  8. David Waite Avatar
    David Waite

    A wonderful conversation. Thanks to all, especially David. I appreciate you, my friend.

  9. Dean Avatar
    Dean

    Thanks David for comments about your father. I heard someone say that some of us are born to be ranchers of great spreads , others farmers on small acreage. I’ve a 1st cousin. His father was a successful businessman. His son, my cousin, eventually rose to position of superintendent of county schools. He became big on the motivational speaking circuit drawing down thousands per speech. Doubtless a rancher. My father drove forklift. I was the only one in my family to graduate college and grad school out of 4 siblings. I eventually taught high school students, some 23 years in the field. I was the farmer. I can see how our fathers had great influence over us, who we became. I love my cousin. He’s a good man. And of course there are many variables in life as to whether we ranch or farm. I have struggled in my life with poor self-esteem…my cousin brimmed with self confidence. Yet, I remember what Father said, that a goal for our children is that they become good people. Hopefully this has occurred to both my cousin and to me. Thanks for loving, kind fathers and their influence over us.

  10. Agata Avatar
    Agata

    Dean, Davids and Dino,
    Your comments have made me realize that my three (almost all) adult sons never have anything good to say about their father… And he is a good man (in general), although I am no longer married to him for a variety of reasons.
    I had a conversation with a Polish friend recently, who commented on how her own children are less respectful towards her and her husband (they are very good parents) compared to how she remembers relating to her parents. We thought it was the American influence, but maybe not, maybe it is a generational issue?

    The only thing I can think of when I hear my sons speak poorly of their father (unfortunately, deep in my heart I agree with them!) is to remind them to remain respectful, since God requires that from us. It’s the only Commandment that actually carries a promise of reward, “of long and good life”…

  11. Simon Avatar
    Simon

    A man who hurts his children doesnt deserve any respect. A man who points a gun at his kids doesnt deserve any respect. Or who rapes their mother in one room while his kids are hiding in another doesnt deserve any respect. And if God requires that of me, then thats a long wait for a train that isnt coming.

  12. Fr. Stephen Freeman Avatar

    Simon,
    To ask someone to respect such a man would be to participate in the abuse. Not respecting them is a gift from God – the ability to tell right from wrong. Prayer is the most that could be asked – and even that is a hard thing.

    God give you grace. These are such terrible memories to carry in a heart. My God protect your soul.

  13. Dee of St Hermans Avatar
    Dee of St Hermans

    Dear Simon, I understand what you’re saying. I’m unable to explain why or even to allude to my own experience. I’ll just say I’m hearing a wounded heart and I ask God for peace for your heart. Forgiving is very difficult in some situations. It has taken me almost 50 years. As my heart begins to heal, the healing has enabled an unexpected expansion. I’m still very much a toddler in this, but I just wanted to say you’re not alone.

  14. Byron Avatar
    Byron

    Hell is, for me, the absence of God. In my mind, God will not send me there, I will choose to go there, by deciding to sin. Sin separates me from God. Sinning is my choice, not God’s. Being in hell – in this life as well as the next – is the result of me choosing to separate myself from God through sin.

    When I was Southern Baptist, this is how I thought of hell. It is a long, hard journey to realize that God does not leave us (“as long as one soul is in hell, Christ will be there with him”); a journey I am still travelling. To see God as always loving is a very difficult thing to do in life! I expect it is even more difficult for those whose lives have been full of despair and pain. My life has been easy thus far and I still suffer from this idea. But God is good; He is leading me through this in a way that I can actually see in life! Glory and thanksgiving to Him in all things!

  15. Karen Avatar
    Karen

    Simon,

    In the face of that kind of abuse, it is exceedingly difficult and nigh unto impossible to discern the humanity and image of God in the person under all the filth of sin in which he has covered himself (or the enemy has covered him). It takes a work of God for that to be revealed to us, and it sometimes never occurs in this life. Your comment reminded me of the testimony I once heard of a man who also had a real abusive bum for a dad. His pain was very real, and when he himself was found by Christ in his adult years, he struggled mightily to forgive his dad with no success (though he was distraught about this). Then one day his dad passed away and the son was given some of his few remaining belongings. In a box he found an old photograph of his father as a boy of about eight years old. Within that picture of a vulnerable boy suddenly was revealed to him the true humanity of his father and he was finally able to genuinely forgive him from the heart and be at peace.

    Respect for such an abusive person will never look like admiration for the twisted adult that person became, but it may eventually with the help of God’s grace take the form of true compassion for the wounded humanity (the vulnerable child) within. It can also for now just look like the effort to restrain oneself from returning evil for evil, and perhaps like praying the prayer for enemies:

    https://glory2godforallthings.com/2009/09/02/short-prayer-for-enemies/

  16. Agata Avatar
    Agata

    Simon,

    I am very sorry if you are describing your own pain, or the pain of somebody you know.

    That is not at all an experience (of my sons or mine) I was describing. Their father was and is (by his standards) loving and caring, just in ways that are a bit different that we may have liked it. He never physically hurt any of us. He was/is just a little too self centered and miserly than he should be.

    May God help and heal such awful family situations as you are describing…

  17. David Foutch Avatar
    David Foutch

    I hope the people who are on this blog, who know have known each other for years, and have a sense for who each other are will forgive the pain that bleeds through my comments. I have a son now. He is 16 months old and I love this kid dearly. But, I would be lying to you if I didn’t tell you that on some level I am fighting not to be like my father everyday. You would think it would be easy to do. I spent all my developmental years with this guy spitting his hate into my soul something of him is bound to stick. I discuss that fear with Father regularly. I am very sorry for the emotional content I keep interjecting. This forum is neither my therapy group nor is it about me. And I think I keep making it about me. I don’t mean to. However, everything I’m doing in Orthodoxy I do for the most part for my son. Consequently, it is going to be more emotional than it should be. Just take it as a sign that my faith matters to me and that it is of upmost importance. If you have suffered the brunt of some dumb thing I’ve said or emotional jab, please, forgive me and just chalk it up to me having a lot to learn.

    Peace

  18. Byron Avatar
    Byron

    David Foutch, it takes time. God, in His Grace, does not coerce us or require a sudden change in us, as is often pointed out here. There is no “magic change”; there is struggle, failure, grace and thanksgiving. Please continue to post your needs and concerns here; we will continue to support you in your journey, realizing it may take a lifetime (as all our journeys usually do). God grant us all Grace, my friend!

  19. Karen Avatar
    Karen

    Simon,

    I posted a whole ton of comments (can pixels weigh something?) on this blog in the early years when I first discovered it. At the time, I was about one year into the Orthodox Church and the only member in my Evangelical family to convert. I was hungry for someone to “converse” with who could understand what I was going through and found in Fr. Stephen’s writing a truly “kindred spirit” to the One speaking within to the deepest needs of my heart—the One that drew me to Orthodoxy in the first place. A couple years later there were some blog awards and GTGFAT received one of those awards. The award site posted stats on each award-winning blog, including the identity (online monikers, not private info) and ranked order of top commenters. It was then I discovered with no small embarrassment, I was at that time this site’s most frequent commenter! I’m not sure that changed much for the next few years, but now I’m much more settled in the faith (or “talked out”) with a lot of questions answered and in a healthy parish, and most of the difficult things we had to work through in our marriage when I converted are now long past. It’s easier to talk to my husband again about the many aspects of our faith that are quite mutual (despite the fact he has never become Orthodox). So I’m content to do more reading/listening now and only comment at length when something really tugs at my heart strings, such as the struggle of someone else that resonates with some of my own deepest convictions of faith. Since there is a history of spiritual abuse in both my husband’s family and mine (not, however, primarily from immediate family), and it was a burning need (no pun intended) to gain a deeper understanding of the nature of Hell that sparked a prayer for insight that was granted in a rather mind-blowing way and which then was the catalyst propelling me into Orthodoxy, your struggles naturally elicit more comments from me than most. Don’t feel bad. It’s always a blessing to repeat (as much for my own benefit as anyone’s) the grace-filled truths of the gospel that healed my heart, to be challenged to hone my expression of them so another can assimilate the message, and watch Grace slowly and surely begin His work of healing in another soul. There is no greater joy. Your repentance (struggles and all) encourages me no end (and I’m sure I speak for many), and you are surely as much a part of this “family” as any here!

  20. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    I second Byron’s comment. David, of coarse you feel free to speak here when and if you choose. I understand it can get a bit squirmy being the topic of a conversation or two. But I think I can speak for most of us here, to quote St. Silouan….”Our brother is our life.” That is all of us to you and you to all of us.
    Simon of Cyrene….man, my brother, you couldn’t have chosen a more appropriate patron Saint. That Cross he carried was a mighty heavy cross. And such an honor to have been chosen to do so. The choice of taking his name reminds me of Jesus’ words to Sts. James and John regarding their future suffering…
    ” But Jesus said to them, “You do not know what you ask. Are you able to drink the cup that I drink, and be baptized with the baptism that I am baptized with?”
    They said to Him, “We are able.”
    So Jesus said to them, “You will indeed drink the cup that I drink, and with the baptism I am baptized with you will be baptized;…” (Mk 10:38-39)
    An awesome future for them. For you too. You carry…He brings you through. And yes, too, also for your son’s sake. Our Father knows that kind of heart…

  21. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Karen…you? The most frequent commenter?! I would have never guessed!
    I surely understand the hunger you felt, wanting to converse with someone about Orthodoxy. I think that is the case for many of us here. I am so indebted to Fr. Stephen for this blog. I know it has contributed profoundly to our journey.
    I’d also like to say Karen, your comments are always very helpful…ones that I have to slow down to read! Like some other people here we know 😉 !

  22. Karen Avatar
    Karen

    Paula,
    Lol! Thanks for the kind comment. Fr. Stephen isn’t the only one here with an effusive keyboard, sometimes, is he?

  23. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Effusive…I like that! No, he certainly isn’t!!!

  24. Ananias Avatar
    Ananias

    My mother, who is not Orthodox and has only attended my church 2 or 3 times, asked me what the Orthodox “Plan of salvation” is. I told her the Orthodox Plan of Salvation is “We Trust God.”
    And that’s it.
    I trust God to determine the fate of my soul upon my death and I trust that God’s decision is the right decision and will always be the right decision and that God knows what He is doing. Nothing I can do will make His decision the wrong decision. My trust is in the Lord and in the Lord’s love for me.

    (Yes I posted this on the Erotic Language post but it applies to both)

  25. Fr. Stephen Freeman Avatar

    Ananias,
    Interesting question on her part. “Plan of salvation” is an English phrase I’ve seen as a translation for “economia” in a number of Orthodox texts, and refers to the whole work of God on our behalf. It’s not about us, but about what God does. Thus, it describes, in particular, His incarnation, death and resurrection. Sometimes this “plan” is described (in short) as “God became what we are so that we might become what He is.” or “God became man so that man could become God.”

    And, we can say, this is through “union” with Him. He united Himself to us in the Virgin’s womb. We are united to Him (for our part) in Holy Baptism. We nurture that union in repentance, confession, and communion in His Body and Blood, and daily by uniting ourselves to Him through obeying His commandments and through prayer. If such a summary were to trouble the Protestant (not yet having heard it use the word “faith”), we could add that all these things we do through faith in Him. But, scandalously, it is not “faith” alone, for faith without works is dead. But it is not by the works but by faith which produces the works.

    Just some thoughts…

  26. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Having just read the link Karen posted (thank you!) about prayer for our enemies, I noticed it is similar to the one in the OSB’s intercessory prayer. That prayer struck me deeply (and still does) when I first read it.
    I have mentioned this before, about how I was drawn to the icon of our Mother “The Softner of Evil Hearts”. The image of Her with the swords piercing Her heart speaks to a pain that words can’t describe. As my eyes fix on that image, even unable to speak, or maybe just groan a few words, She offers a balm for my soul, with gentleness and compassion.
    What is very telling is that the prayer for that icon includes our own heart, as well as our enemies’, that needs softening. Here’s the prayer:
    Soften our evil hearts, O Theotokos, * and quench the attacks of those who hate us * and
    loose all straitness of our soul. * For looking on thy holy icon * we are filled with
    compunction by thy suffering and loving-kindness for us * and we kiss thy wounds; * we are
    filled with horror for the darts with which we wound thee. * Let us not, O Mother of
    Compassion, * according to the cruelty of our hearts, perish from the cruelty of heart of
    those near us, ** For thou art in truth the Softener of Evil Hearts.
    And the entire Akathist:
    http://www.peterandpaul.net/sites/files/AkathistToTheMotherOfGodSoftenerOfEvilHearts.pdf
    for those who’d like to read it…..

    Dee….Last night I watched that video you mentioned, “Bless my Prison”. It was intense. Amazing what these brave people endure for the Faith and a noble cause…for them, freedom from oppression. It was interesting to find out at the very end, the ending of her earthly life. Thanks for pointing us to that film.

  27. TimOfTheNorth Avatar
    TimOfTheNorth

    Paula, thank you for that… I had barely finished reading your post, silently “mumbling”, if even that, the prayer to the Theotokos when my email program alerted to me to a new email. It was conciliatory response from someone dear to me with whom I have been at odds in a deeply painful way. My eyes fill with tears as I write this. I am going to print out the whole Akathist. Most Holy Theotokos, pray for us!

  28. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Oh Tim! How beautiful! Glory to the Theotokos! Made almost cry!

  29. Michael Bauman Avatar
    Michael Bauman

    David, one reason we pray for our enemies is so we do not become like them. All the more reason to pray for our parents. I think a lot of men share your motivation. I certainly did. May God bless you with mercy and peace of soul.

  30. Agata Avatar
    Agata

    Paula,
    Thank you for sharing the Akathists to the Mother of God, Softener of Evil Hearts.
    I recently met a Russian friend who told me she prays some of the Akathists at the same time they are prayed in one church in Russia. This church is in Bolgar, Tatarstan, Russia (you’d have to figure out the time difference with where you live). If you look at this part of their web site, (I know the link looks terrible, Father may not allow it to stay, I guess this is how Russian characters show up – but copy and paste actually works), you will see that this Akathist is prayed on Wednesdays at 2:30 am (!!), 8:30 am, 2:30 pm and 8:30 pm. My friend told me people around the world pray with this church for their special intentions…

    I think it is a lovely idea… 🙂

    https://xn—-7sbabedbk5crfujheqog8q.xn--p1ai/%D1%80%D0%B0%D0%B7%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BB%D1%8B/%D1%80%D0%B0%D1%81%D0%BF%D0%B8%D1%81%D0%B0%D0%BD%D0%B8%D0%B5-%D0%BC%D0%BE%D0%BB%D0%B8%D1%82%D0%B2%D1%8B-%D0%BF%D0%BE-%D1%81%D0%BE%D0%B3%D0%BB%D0%B0%D1%88%D0%B5%D0%BD%D0%B8%D1%8E

  31. Dee of St Hermans Avatar
    Dee of St Hermans

    Paula thank you so much for the Akathist. I’ve printed it up and have started to pray this prayer.

    And thank you for the link Agata. I took a peek. I enjoy the sights and pictures. But don’t know Russian😊. The written stuff can be translated though, through the browser translator.

  32. David Waite Avatar
    David Waite

    Byron –

    About “Hell is, for me, the absence of God. In my mind, God will not send me there, I will choose to go there, by deciding to sin. Sin separates me from God. Sinning is my choice, not God’s. Being in hell – in this life as well as the next – is the result of me choosing to separate myself from God through sin. ”

    God is love. God is always loving, always forgiving. He would never send me to hell, which is separation from Him and His love. But I can choose to separate myself from God and His love. That is what sin is: the choice to separate myself from God and His love. I can do this, I can separate myself from His love, by pride, anger, greed, gluttony, lust, envy, and just plain spiritual laziness. That will put me in hell. But that does not mean that God is sending me to hell as punishment of my sins. To the contrary, I am choosing to be in hell by being proud, angry, greedy, gluttonous, lustful, envious, and too lazy to pray or attempt to make any connection with Him. As Father says, it is not legal cause and effect. It is ontological.

    I do not think of myself as a Southern Baptist. But if, as you say, that is what Southern Baptists believe, then I guess I am a Southern Baptist. (Thought I was getting to be a little Orthodox.) No matter. I am still convinced that if I chose to not pray today (for example), then I am choosing to distance myself from God. And that is hell.

  33. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Agata…I agree, it is a lovely idea to pray at the same time with those across the globe. Thank you! Funny though, I never saw such a link with all those symbols! You and Dee are right, it does work. Conveniently, my computer automatically offers to translate.
    So, my eyes lit up upon seeing the very first akathist to Michael the Archangel…my patron ‘Saint’! (my Orthodox name is Michaela 🙂 ) Very interesting that they describe his akathist as a guide “in comprehending the wisdom of sciences” (Dee! Simon! I think of you!) And yes, I see where our Mother’s akathist is further on down.
    It was so touching to read (above) how Tim was blessed through this prayer to Her. It was as well a ‘rebound’ blessing for me, as I have asked Her to bless me in getting to know Her better. As a child in a Catholic home, I undoubtedly knew of Her. But as I left the confines of church and home, all that was lost. Needless to say it was further dead and buried during my Protestant years. But coming to Orthodoxy, I just knew I was to honor Her…and outwardly I did. But I told Her “I don’t know you like I know your Son…I want to know you and love you like the Russians (!) who know and love you as their protector”. Seriously…how awkward! Slowly She is pulling back the veil. Here’s another thing…I thought of posting that prayer the day before I had posted it…even typed it up, but for some reason chose not to submit it (it just didn’t seem appropriate at the time). But the next day, after reading Karen’s link to prayer for our enemies, I said ‘well, it’s time’. Did this delay in posting until the next day have anything to do with the timing of Tim reading the prayer and concurrently receiving that email from his friend? I believe so…and not only that, it glorifies our Blessed Theotokos. And finally, reveals to me without a doubt that She hears and is answering my awkward prayers.
    Our prayers are answered in ways unforseen by us, involving the lives of many here in Her blessing. Tim…I’m glad for you, and thank you for sharing that very special moment.

  34. Agata Avatar
    Agata

    Paula,
    Wow, wow, wow!
    You have no idea how meaningful your words are for me, as I pray similarly to the Theotokos these days, although coming to this place (as David/Simon would say) from a “vector of slightly different magnitude and direction”… 🙂

    “She hears and is answering my awkward prayers” too…

  35. Ananias Avatar
    Ananias

    I came from a Protestant background so I knew very little about the Theotokos. I mean I knew she existed and gave birth to Our Lord, but that was it. I knew nothing else about her and what little I thought I knew was pretty much a result of protestant ignorance.

    When I came to Orthodoxy, it took me a long time to wrap my mind around the Theotokos, the icons, Orthodox worship, the eucharist, the prayers, and pretty much everything. Almost everything was a 180 degree difference to what I had been taught. Fortunately, I have a very patient priest and parish because I continue to grow into the faith, learning something every day.
    There may or may not be a few extra gray hairs upon Father’s head, and probably a few other parishioners, thanks to me. (LOL – j/k)

    What helped me with the Theotokos was both the emphasis on the fact that we do not worship her, the fact that she is the Mother of God, she is chosen by God, and the hymns sung during liturgy and Vespers, having many parish members willing to very lovingly and patiently answer my many questions, and a very patient priest, reading some of what St. Seraphim of Sarov wrote, and a some other writings, all helped me to get where I am now.

    And of course, I must mention Fr. Stephen’s blog helped me as well.

  36. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Ananias,
    I appreciate your comments and understand the impact of ‘the 180 degree change’.
    I just want to clarify what I meant by desiring to “know” the Theotokos. It is the difference between knowing “about” Her and “knowing” Her. Becoming familiar with what has been written about Her in scripture and other sources, both which witness to Her life on earth, along with many others who have written in reference to Her and their witness of Her presence throughout time, is invaluable. What I meant, though, was I want to know Her by experience, through prayer, through the icons, through our presence in the Liturgy, through thoughts in heart toward Her. Both are invaluable, the readings and actual ‘involvement’.
    Just a bit of a clarification….

  37. Dean Avatar
    Dean

    Paula,
    Thanks for clarification to Ananias. Over the years I have found that as we place a new icon and begin asking for his/her intercessions, they make “movement ” towards us, each in his/her own way. As we differ in personality I’ve discovered that they do also in their speaking to our hearts.
    It is wonderful to experience their reciprocity in love towards us.

  38. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Now that’s interesting Dean…an awareness of their unique personalities by the way they speak to the heart. Awesome.
    You know, your words here bring me back to your comment to both Ananias and I, that in the passage of time life in the Church “just gets better”. Very encouraging Dean. I treasure little nuggets like that!

  39. Ananias Avatar
    Ananias

    Thank you Paula. I appreciate your comments.
    It was hard for me to reconcile Orthodoxy to all that I had been taught and I had to relearn almost everything. Of course, I actually did nothing because it’s pretty much God who has done it all for me, because I’m just incapable of doing it myself.

    Remember St. Mary of Egypt, and her story. When I first heard that story, I wept. (It seems since coming to Orthodoxy, I weep a lot) It touched me in a way that is beyond words.

    I think that St. Mary of Egypt’s story helped me to actually accept the Theotokos, the Orthodox teachings of the Theotokos, and how we honor her, more than anything else. And that, alongside of St. Seraphim of Sarov, helped me to start honoring her and that helped me to start honoring the other saints as well.

    That does remind me that, at some point during my teen years, I had a crisis of faith and just was at a loss and at that point, despite being protestant and having been taught against such a thing, I actually did cry out to the Theotokos, but I didn’t know her as such. I didn’t know what else to do, I was at the end of my rope, and I simply cried out in that moment without knowing anything, much like St. Mary of Egypt did.
    I simply knew she was Jesus’s mother and that the Roman Catholics had the rosary, so I figured that maybe there was some truth somewhere in their prayers, teachings and beliefs.
    I cried out for help and here I am now, proving what Fr. Stephen said in response to my comment concerning the Orthodox “Plan of Salvation,” and how it refers to God’s work in us, doing for us what we are unable to do for ourselves.

  40. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Ananias! You cried out to the Theotokos! during a crisis…while a Protestant?!! Please excuse my excitability….its just me…but where (I rhetorically ask) do you think that came from?!! Oh no brother…you are exactly where She was beckoning you to be!! I have yet to hear a Protestant cry out to the Theotokos!! Not anyone from the churches I was in! No…now that’s good stuff, Ananias!
    Lovely story about St. Mary of Egypt too. So glad for you, that you are embracing God’s energies towards you. Powerful love, grace… gentle but very powerful. Yes, Father’s response to you proven true!
    …another nugget Dean says a lot…God is good and He loves mankind! Yes indeed!

  41. Byron Avatar
    Byron

    David Waite, I did not say that is what Southern Baptists believe, only what I believed at one point (when I happened to be Southern Baptist). To clarify, for Southern Baptists, belief tends to be determined by the individual, not the church.

    That is what sin is: the choice to separate myself from God and His love. I can do this, I can separate myself from His love, by pride, anger, greed, gluttony, lust, envy, and just plain spiritual laziness. That will put me in hell

    Sin is not separation from God; we cannot be separated from God. He never leaves us (and we would simply cease to exist if we were somehow separated from Him). However, I think the difference here is one of semantics. As you also pointed out, sin is ontological. Hell is not a place to which we “go” as much as something to which we cling.

  42. Ananias Avatar
    Ananias

    Byron,

    That actually reminds me of when Fr. Stephen Freeman came and spoke about Heaven, Hell and Salvation at our parish. He quoted, I believe it was a story by C.S. Lewis.
    In this story, they brought the residents of Hell into heaven and after a while the residents decided to leave, because Heaven hurt them. In hell they had started to fade away from reality. Some where mere shadows while others were what we would call a ghost. In heaven, everyone and everything was so real and so solid that it hurt those who had started to fade away.
    However, he used this to explain that Heaven is where we become more real, because we’re close to the source of reality itself, God.
    Hell is where people begin to fade away from reality, and the further you are away from God, the less a part of reality and the less real you are, because you are further away from the source of all Reality.
    Forgive me, Fr. Stephen came to our church about 3 or 4 years ago, so I don’t remember the exact words he used, so I’m probably not articulating it exactly right.

  43. David Waite Avatar
    David Waite

    Byron –
    Thank you for your response. Perhaps I should remain silent, since I know so little, but commenting allows me to subscribe to additional comments. I will try to say less, in the hope that will minimize my errors. I am only learning, after all.

  44. Byron Avatar
    Byron

    David Waite, keep posting, it is how we all learn!

    Sometimes we debate/discuss and then realize that we actually agree–we just say the same things differently! I think learning to say things correctly is very important. This is especially true in our society, where so many tend to talk past each other using the same language. I learn a great deal concerning how to “speak Orthodoxy” here thanks to all the great folks who share so much. Please continue to take part and enjoy the conversation.

    Ananias, yes that is a wonderful way to put it. Thanks for the reminder!

  45. honingbij Avatar
    honingbij

    Father,
    Which prayer book has the translation of the morning prayer that you used at the beginning of this post? I like it better than the translation of the same prayer in the Jordanville book.

  46. Fr. Stephen Freeman Avatar

    I think this is the OCA prayerbook.

  47. honingbij Avatar
    honingbij

    Thank you, Father!

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